On Being a Grown-Up

September 29, 2014

in Life Lessons

on being a grown upI always get the thoughtful–sometimes challenging–questions from my kids while driving. Typically it’s when we have a long drive or a lot of traffic, which means I can’t escape the ones I am not quite prepared to answer. Asking me how babies come out of a mommy’s body while driving on the highway many years ago is one that comes to mind (My response: “That’s a great question to ask daddy at dinner tonight!”).

Monkey, my youngest, is the one who most often likes to spend drive time having discussions on everything from childbirth to our favorite letter of the alphabet. Recently he posed this question:

“Mom, is it fun being a grown-up?”

What quickly became clear in our discussion was my son’s concern about life as an adult being terrible because adults have to work and pay for everything. It surprised me because Monkey’s two dads and I are all deeply passionate about what we do professionally, and love our work. Additionally, the kids see how great it is that I own my own company, allowing me the flexibility to never miss a baseball game, see the kids off to school daily, and not work their school holidays.

What I realized in digging deeper into the discussion is that hating a job and complaining about bills is so prevalent in society that our kids are attuned to this. Quitting a job is at the top of the list of what people would do if they hit the lottery, for example. Too often aspects of life are described as a grind rather than a fun adventure.

In speaking with someone this morning, we were discussing the details of his weekend and mine. After hearing I had a date with my husband, a relaxing Saturday, enjoyed football, and worked a ½ day Sunday, he focused on the latter part of my weekend: working. “Oh, that’s too bad,” he stated sympathetically. I found myself in a position not unfamiliar to me: explaining that I love my work.

Have I always been excited to rise each morning to start a new day?

No, of course not.

What we each have as adults is the freedom to make choices. We can better our lives through making changes in relationships (romantic or platonic), careers, financial situations, and many more aspects of life. We all have the ability to make being a grown-up fun.

Along with these abilities to make big life choices for myself as an adult, here are just a few more grown-up benefits I enjoy:

  • No one tells me when it’s “lights out” time.
  • Making my bed is optional.
  • Completing geometry proofs is never required.
  • Jumping in puddles in the rain doesn’t involve a scolding.
  • I only make vegetables I like to eat.

What about you?

Why do you like being a grown-up?

Image Credit

{ 4 comments }

Finding Calm in the Crazy

September 12, 2014

in Life Lessons

finding calm in writingMy life has been crazy this year.

I planned a wedding, got married, launched a new blogazine, and merged two houses into one a couple of weeks before the wedding. And that was all in the first five months of the year. I went on to have the four younger kids here for a month, served as main taxi service to sports and camps, and helped my oldest just a few weeks before fall semester to re-enroll in college. After we got our oldest situated in school and moved into our home, Sean and I kicked off our major home renovation plans. With the big overhaul to the house happening, we will be living is some state of disarray for many months to come. Oh, and my business has more than doubled in size this year–so work has kept me very busy through all of this.

While it’s all been positive, I am ready to slow down. This isn’t the easiest goal to set for myself though. I am still a mom with five kids, and have a house that will have sections of it torn apart on a regular basis from now until spring. My business isn’t going to slow down either, and the kids’ sport schedules will continue. I know life will remain busy.

What I can do, to get to a less crazy place, is to find moments to be still–whether it’s my body or mind slowing down. This morning, it was enjoying my cup of coffee on the deck and writing before starting my workday.

Here are ideas I came up with to bring about calm in the midst of the crazy:

  • Read
  • Work in the garden.
  • Go for a walk.
  • Play a game with the kids.
  • Go on an adventure.
  • Sit outside and enjoy the cooler weather.
  • Write (for this website)
  • Go for a run on the canal.
  • Practice guitar.
  • Date night with my husband.
  • Organize something (the end result always makes me happy).
  • Cook
  • Schedule time with a girlfriend.

Even in the busiest of days, I know at least one thing on this list could be done daily. And with that, a little calm can be added into my crazy.

Tell me: what do you do that helps you to slow down?

 

{ 0 comments }

On Never Getting Old

August 16, 2014

in Life Lessons

Screen Shot 2014-08-16 at 8.57.25 AM

It is not length of life, but depth of life.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am never going to get old.

It’s not that I fear aging, but rather don’t want to be that person. The one who stops living life as an adventure because they hit a certain age. I don’t ever want to utter, “I’m too old to do that” when given the opportunity for a new challenge.

This isn’t about desperately holding onto society’s view of youthful beauty. That’s something I haven’t believed in. Instead, as my face changes, I find I like my laugh lines…the little exclamation points, adding a greater emphasis to my expression of happiness.

Being young is about maintaing a youthful state of mind.

For me, staying young has meant continuing to explore, learn, and experience life fully. In the last 10 years (age: 35-45), here’s a sampling of what I have done:

  • Taken up running
  • Trained and competed in half marathons, duathlons, and triathlons
  • Started this blog
  • Started learning guitar
  • Received a second degree (Photography)
  • Started a new business
  • Learned new skills (graphic design, coding, web development, for example)
  • Got married

Most recently, I took on a new challenge: Crossfit. I had that am-I-crazy conversation with myself, and realized it was something I had to try. I love it–the stretches, the workout of the day (WOD), the soreness that is inevitable, and the camaraderie with the other members of the box (gym). And, most of all, it’s bonding on another level with my husband (the Crossfit addict).

I still have many more things I want to do in my youth, for example:

  • Become fluent in a language
  • Spend a season living in Tuscany
  • Learn how to make gluten-free pasta
  • Re-read many classics
  • Read other classics for the first time
  • Start a gluten-free recipe blog
  • Expand my business
  • Obtain a Masters of Liberal Studies
  • Go to circus camp

I know these great experiences are waiting for me in the next ten years.

Tell me, what do you want to do in your youth?

What are you waiting for?

 

 

{ 12 comments }

Love and Money

September 30, 2013
Early in dating, I told Sean a lot of things that would never happen in our relationship. We wouldn’t date seriously, exclusively, or marry. Ever, on the last one. He took it all in stride, never wavering in his confidence in himself or the possibility of something really great developing between us. So when I told […]
Read the full article → Relationships 14 comments

Match Helps Single Parents Find Love

September 30, 2013
Online dating sites were helpful for me as a single mom; I was able to screen significantly before committing to meet someone (time saver!) and, as unromantic as it sounds, it was efficient. As a busy, single mom, these were important factors for me. I always believed there were special challenges I faced as a […]
Read the full article → Singledom 0 comments

Making Time to Learn and Bond

September 20, 2013
Fully embracing life and being happy has been a goal that has remained a constant in my life since the split from my ex. In fact, shortly after our separation, I made a bucket list. Not things I wanted to do at an advanced age, but rather experiences I wanted to have in my life […]
Read the full article → Blending a Family 0 comments